It is because of the endurance of thousand years of sadness and loneliness, God is eternal.


 

People appreciate others with long memories as a gift. I like memories. It is those past proved our very existence.I remember every details that is important to me. It is not that I have a computer chip inside my brain. But as you can see, I love noting them down and reviewing them whenever i feel like. It should be very interesting to look what I am doing now when I become old.

Well, sometimes those memories maybe to too much for us to carry them anymore. They provoke too much emotions that one get mesmorized into phantoms. It snares your whole body and mind! Your vision, your hearing, even your nostril! One feel stiffled. You have got so much but nowhere to release them. They create anxiety and uneasiness for oneself and also for others who close to you.

I have deleted many things from my pc, pictures, videos, notes and so on. I don’t know what is the logics behind it, but I used to keep important things as my passwords. I have to change many of my passwords. I have already tried several times earlier, none of them availed. I think this is the most ‘ambitious’ and complete attempt I have ever taken in order to forget. It even makes me wonder how I have accumulated so much there…hehe…The thing that does not make me happy or trigger unpleasant memories need to be put aside now.

Meantime, it is also worthwhile to divert and engage one’s thought on other productive things. I am putting extra efforts in my work, study. I am putting more energy in socialisation with new friends, even I happen to talk to random people over the internet which I considered a pure waste of time. Besides that, i am also trying to do things that I like, and make myself cheerful, like painting, sketching, playing music, watch animes, read novels, playing tennis. It makes me feel much lighter.

There is a need to forget…

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